Nearly a year ago, I was still doubting if I truly wanted go into the medical field.
Growing up, I've always wanted to be a teacher. However, around sixth grade, I decided that what I really wanted to do in life is act. I wanted to be "an actress-slash-director," as I used to say. Everything that I did surrounded acting -- workshops, theater, solo performances, recitals, auditions, LA trips, Orange County High School of Arts, Glee, Newport Beach Film Festival, movies, film classes, screenwriting classes, and multiple friends in Hollywood. That was the life.
I was so set on pursuing film and theater in college that I even toured the sets of Universal Studios, UCLA, USC and Chapman University Film Schools. I networked with alumni and current film students at USC, ready to ask for letters of recommendations. I had so much passion, so much drive, and (as I humbly say) talent that I had confidence I would succeed in Hollywood if I pursued this career path. My whole family and my friends knew what I wanted and what I was going for -- they all supported me unconditionally.
However, life works in mysterious ways.
My high school required juniors to intern at any location where they would be interested in working in the future. My first plans: LA agency or a production company. I job shadowed and volunteered at Newport Beach Film Festival that spring, wanting to see the ins and outs of popular film festivals. I had already talked to old acting teachers, and an agency I once auditioned for -- if I wanted an internship in LA, I could have gotten it.
One day, my mother said, "You already know a lot of things in the entertainment industry. Why not explore medicine?" I had grown up surrounded with science -- my step-dad is an engineer, my mother (and most of my relatives) is a nurse, my brother is a Biology major. I had competed in Science Olympiad, Academic Pentathlon, attended science fairs, and presented science projects at the Nixon Library. I had the love for science, even though I never thought of it as a career choice.
I listened to my mother (as we always should). I decided to apply for an internship at UCI Medical Center, along with 24 other students from my school. We did three rotations, spending two weeks in each rotation.
During my rotation at the Acute Rehabilitation Unit, my life turned into a rollercoaster. Going in, I told my mentor that there was no way I would ever consider nursing. "I don't want to be like my mom," I said. I focused my rotations at the medical center with physical therapists, not nursing. However, as time passed, I found the work of physical therapists to be unexciting.
I ended up following a bunch of nurses during all my three rotations instead.
You see, nurses are like the backbone of a hospital. They take care of the patients, communicate with families, assess conditions, and even though they are qualified to do the work of a doctor, they still had to clean rooms and wipe butts. For me, that was humbling.
I cannot tell you how confused I was about my life right there and then. All these years, I have focused on networking in the entertainment industry. I wanted to be an actress! If you know me, you know how indecisive I am. Just to get an idea, I had to flip a coin the other day because I couldn't decide what to eat for lunch. Acting was the one thing I was sure of.
But then again, life works in mysterious ways.
The Lord put a patient with osteoporosis in my life for one week. This patient became my muse. She helped me see that maybe I should give nursing a try. Maybe, just maybe, I've been focused on the wrong thing. Maybe I can be a nurse and become a teacher, like what I wanted when I was just a little tiny munchkin.
I told my mom at the end of my summer that I'm going to apply to nursing schools. My mom, at first, laughed. She did not believe me. I have a reputation of being the most sarcastic child, so I didn't really blame her. She didn't even believe me until she actually saw my college applications.
During the course of my senior year, I kept on testing whether I really belonged in the medical field. I took my Basic Life Support certification (CPR, First Aid, AED) just to see if it'd maybe freak me out. Then I took my phlebotomy certification; surely, getting blood from another human being would make me back out. My externship for phlebotomy was even at a not-very-nice hospital; I wanted to see if I'd hate working with medical assistants who gossiped all day and patients who didn't speak a lick of English. Instead, I enjoyed the process of getting those certifications and met amazing people along the way.
Fast forward, I am now a nursing major in a 4-year BSN program. When my mom told me that nursing school was hard, I didn't completely believe her until I actually started college. As freshmen, multiple students already failed a class. The program had to keep readjusting requirements so that the majority of the students would not fail. I heard of first-semester sophomores failing out of the program, and dozens who were changing their majors. So many people want to become nurses today that programs are starting to get harder.
Personally, I believe that I will pass nursing school. It'll most likely take most of my sleep, my social life, and my mind but I believe that with the guidance of the Lord, family, and friends, anything is possible.
School gets tough; after all, we have to earn our degrees. However, as long as we remind ourselves of why we decided to pursue our career paths in the first place, we will get through. Sometimes I cannot help but think, "What if I decided to pursue film instead?"
But then I continue to think, "Well, what if I decided not to even consider becoming a nurse?" Imagine all the friends I wouldn't have met, the school I wouldn't have attended, and the professors I would not have learned from.
I wouldn't trade anything for the experience I have gotten this year at San Diego.
This post is more for me than for anyone else. I get too stressed out with my academics and the extra-curricular activities that I am doing at my university. So once in a while, I must remind myself of how funny life can get. Today, I am confident that I will become a nurse. In the future, who knows? Maybe I'll end up pursuing my acting career.
Just remember this: In anything that you do, have passion. Let whatever you are pursuing be the fire to your fuel because if you do not have the enthusiasm, you are risking your happiness and success.
Your whole world isn't revolved around academia, even though it's an important aspect. Start a habit, get involved in clubs, organizations, or Greek life. Pursue leadership, personal growth, and charity. Focus on what makes you happy while still focusing on academics -- after all, your future career won't be the only thing in your life.
Some of my friends say that I have a "cool" life when they hear about the things I have done or people that I have met. However, I do the things that I do in order to figure myself out. I don't know who I am, and I'm not particularly great at anything -- so why not try different things to help me find myself along the way? As Albert Einstein said, "I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious."
Quote of the day: "Anything that gets your blood racing is worth doing." - Hunter Thompson
Much sun,
Annika
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